Have you ever been blind?

In 2006 I was legally blind in my left eye. That was the beginning of my disease process. Over a 2 week period I went from 20/20 with glasses to 20/300 with glasses. That just sucked! In those first few days when I was blind I spent every minute taking in all sights I could. Well that is while I was not in a doctor office. During this process I argued and manage to piss off the entire MD staff of a Medical School.... hint... starts with Wake. =)
At that point I was going to go to a MAJOR medical program not some pseudo wanna be in NC. My primary eye physician gave me major steroids. 100mg p.o. daily for 4 months. I then weaned to 0 over the next 2 months. My vision corrected but certain anomalies stayed. These are to medical profound to go into here but my vision has never been "normal". Over the next many years I had recurring bouts of "optic neuritis", some required steroids while some just went away. During this time of my life I began to think I may have an autoimmune disease. This is the case today, I am battling an autoimmune disorder/disease. My current stable of doctors say optic neuritis is too simple of a diagnosis. In 2 weeks I head to Minnesota to the Mayo Clinic. I should have done this 6 years ago but my mind and pride would not let me. Perhaps it was fear and not pride, I am full of fear concerning this upcoming pilgrimage. I am full of what ifs. Scared am I, a 6 foot 200lb man afraid of a trip that most possibly will give me much needed answers. My loving wife says to stay positive and not let the negative thoughts cloud my brain. I say, easier said than done.