“Some friends don't understand this. They don't understand how desperate I am to have someone say, I love you and I support you just the way you are because you're wonderful just the way you are. They don't understand that I can't remember anyone ever saying that to me. I am so demanding and difficult for my friends because I want to crumble and fall apart before them so that they will love me even though I am no fun, lying in bed, crying all the time, not moving. Depression is all about If you loved me you would.”
― Elizabeth Wurtzel, Prozac Nation
Sometimes start and end with a good quote. It gets to the point better than some rambling story of yours. Life and depression seem to go along so well these days. Why are people prone to this "blue" feeling. Melancholy sucks! It is good for writing songs and maybe poems but for just LIVIN it sucks! I have had and am battling depression.
Do you think of me the times I'm thinking of you? When it rains, is this for me? Questions of humanity or emotional thoughts can go on and on. A never ending story of doubt and deep thought. I will now share a mental conversation I have had with myself on more than one occasion.
"You pansy! Just be done with it. Do something. You have out lived your usefulness. They will miss you when you're gone." I have had this in my brain more than once in my near 31 years. " Don't do it. Think of your wife and child. You have never allowed anyone to beat you, so don't let being depressed win!" I always have that spin through shortly after the first part.
I have met people from all walks of life and all have these issues. All deal with them differently. Many see doctors and get treated with medication. Medication is good. Others find a certain "thing" to use as a safety blanket. They pull it out when they feel depression sneaking up on them. They never really conquer the disease but find a way to push it away. Sports and religion are the 2 I have seen the most. They dive into them head first, you would think they were a preacher or head coach. It works and that is all that matters.
Finding what works for you is the key. You know the saying idle hands are the devils plaything, well an idle mind can be the same thing. Sitting around in the dark, crying, listening to Nirvana and watching Scar kill Mufasa on repeat is not the best option. Dwelling on your inner demons is not a good choice either. Feeling old because you just stay home now with little social friends may bring you down. It could be an upside, remember as you grow as a person so do friends. Many times you grow apart and its time to move on and find new avenues of friendship. Maybe you want to be a social butterfly but it is not in the hands God gave you. Perhaps a bible study for people your age is the key. These things are often posted in many places and even on social media. Finding a club or group activity is easy, YOU just have to make yourself do it. " I work full time. I only go to work with this cloud on my head and come home and cry. No time for other stuff." Okay, you are now a commercial my friend. Time management is the key to healthy living. To me, time management is the key to life. That was the main thing I taught my students, if you properly account for things you will always have time for lunch. In a hospital lunch is very important, many reading this did not know that.
As a last resort, using work as the key to beating depression is understandable. Pour yourself into it, do it all. Volunteer for any group, be the one to stay late, yes boss I will get all that info for you. Go getter is the term I think. I only went go getter to get a raise or a promotion. Thats me not you. School is a great option. LEARNING, that will get you far. If you cannot beat something, learn about it. After that it is beatable. To truly understand anything you most see both sides of it. The good and bad, light and dark. Become THE student, master your subjects. If TV is a passion and it makes you happy become a master of trivia. Keep the mind active. That is a key.
You see, beating or overcoming depression requires drive and the urge to do it. Asking for help is step one, ask anyone. Brother,sister,pastor,therapist,mom,dad anyone you think important enough to help you. Step 2 is generally fighting it. I mainly talked about the fighting aspects. Recovery from this disease happens but relapses happen too. Meds help those. Your activity helps those. Talking helps those. Bottling
up the bad shit in life and allowing it poison you leads you down the wrong path. See it coming and go visit a confidant. Get it out before it spreads. You know like caddyshack 2. YOU MAY NOT GET THAT REFERENCE.
"When life gives you a hundred reasons to cry, show life you have a thousands reasons to smile."
Unknown
DEDICATED TO ANYONE DEPRESSED WHO NEEDS A REASON TO SAY, SCREW THIS!
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